In an exclusive sit-down, Patty Patricide interviews the most litigated, subpoenaed, and emotionally neglected piece of tech in American history. Yes — the laptop.
The movement, unofficially dubbed “Operation Roll Coal 2.0”, started in Mississippi, where State Senator Carl Duntley (R–Hattiesburg) introduced a bill declaring that “electric vehicles represent not only an attack on traditional American energy, but also a threat to masculine identity, family values, and the sacred act of internal combustion.”
A sophomore’s digital pep talk spiraled into a disciplinary crackdown after students began feeling mildly better about themselves.
He achieved financial freedom by waking up at 4:11 a.m., rejecting joy, and not speaking to friends for six years. You can too.
Budgeting is out. Reflection is in. A new app breaks down every purchase by emotional consequence, social fallout, and future therapy cost.