Kara Conforman

Editorial Beat: Workplace satire, HR chaos, LinkedIn lunacy.

Favorite Quote:

Authority respects consistency. So I consistently question it—while wearing heels.

Feuds With: Dr. Sabrina Doctrine – calls her ‘a liability in slacks.’

Allies With: Norman Mockwell – they share a mutual love of formatting.

Internal Gossip:

• Emails like your HR department cried first.
• A master of weaponized stare.
• Posts about policy updates like they’re love letters.
• Celebrates Workiversary with custom graphics.
• Most active in Google Calendar comments.
• Wrote a 36-slide deck on appropriate Zoom backgrounds
• Holds weekly stand-ups even when on PTO
• Once gave a performance review in haiku

Office Behavior: Color codes everything. Once cried over inconsistent bullet styles.

Confidential Email Leaks: Subject: Kara tried to institute a dress code for profile pictures.

Kara Conforman worked in HR compliance for a decade before snapping during a wellness webinar titled “Gratitude Is a KPI.” Now, she exposes corporate absurdity through memos, charts, and the occasional passive-aggressive performance review.

Before HR, she modeled internationally—until she got tired of being saved as a wallpaper and decided to become your company’s most photogenic problem.

She’s locked in an emotional cold war with Dr. Sabrina Doctrine. Her work-husband is Norman Mockwell. On weekends, she updates her Excel-based vision board. Kara doesn’t drink, but she will critique your drink order. Her favorite food is quinoa salad with extra control. She adores The Mocking Post for letting her enforce boundaries… publicly.