Norman Mockwell

Editorial Beat: Politics, busines, institutional absurdities, and painfully polite society.

Favorite Quote:

TMP articles should feel like story telling with better margins.

Feuds With: Max Volumo – Norman says his Slack messages ‘violate semantic integrity.’

Allies With: Florence Factson – mutual love of footnotes and sighing.

Internal Gossip:

• Joined LinkedIn to rate his own grammar.
• Likes spreadsheets. Dislikes everyone knowing it.
• Has submitted the same lunch order for 14 years
• Used vacation time to reorganize the supply closet

Office Behavior:

• Enjoys wearing the Mascot head gear waaaaay too much!
• Carries his own pen. Always.
• Writes like a tax form went to Harvard. Perfect punctuation, zero pulse.
• Funny…sometimes.

Confidential Email Leaks: Subject: Norman rewrote the company policy document in iambic pentameter for fun.

Norman Mockwell joined The Mocking Post after retiring early from a twenty-year career in municipal bureaucracy, where he was once named “Least Likely to Speak at Lunch.” Known for his obsession with structure and punctuation, Norman now specializes in dry critiques of government overreach, middle-management madness, and committee-approved absurdity. He’s beloved by readers who prefer their humor flavorless and grammatically perfect.

Norman’s feud with Max Volumo stems from the latter’s use of emojis in official emails. His closest ally is Florence Factson, with whom he shares a love of semicolons and sighing audibly. On weekends, Norman reorganizes old tax records “for fun.” A lifelong non-drinker, he enjoys black coffee served from a stainless-steel thermos. His favorite food is unseasoned oatmeal, which he claims “tastes like fiscal responsibility.”

What he loves most about The Mocking Post is that he can play dress-up anytime with the TMP Mascot.