What We Think Our Readers Look Like (Please Don’t Correct Us)
We made a list of the archetypes who read The Mocking Post. If you’re here, you’re probably a little too online, too smart for your job, and oddly passionate about fonts. We love you.
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Influencers Are the New Gods and We Built the Religion Ourselves
The influencer class has become our modern clergy, they blessing products, cursing restaurants, and performing miracles like turning vanity into income.
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If DEI Protected Against Weight Bias, Half of America Would Suddenly Love It
Critics hate DEI when it’s about race. But if hiring bias shifted to weight, suddenly two-thirds of America would be waving rainbow-colored DEI flags.
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Pam Bondi on Power, Politics, and Prosecuting Trump
In our latest UnAsked, Pam Bondi opens up about her loyalty to Trump, her take on Florida justice, and her definition of “ethics,” which appears to include consulting fees.
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AI Just Took Your Entry-Level Job, But Don’t Worry, The CEO Got a Bonus for It
Companies claim AI makes them more efficient. Translation: no new hires, record profits, and a CEO so rich he now identifies as a data set.
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Millions Still Waiting for the Rapture, Ignoring Every Other Thing That’s Already Come for Them
Millions still cling to the Rapture prophecy, waiting for salvation that’ll never come, despite already being left behind by education, logic, and rent payments.
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MAGA Crowd Cheers Both Forgiveness and Hate, Hypocrisy as Love Language
One rally. Two lines. MAGA cheered for Christian forgiveness and then for unfiltered hatred. Turns out hypocrisy sounds best with a backing track of Kid Rock.
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Immigrants Still Taking American Jobs, Mostly the Ones No One Else Wants
Americans say immigrants are stealing jobs, just not the ones that involve heat, lifting, or responsibility.
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Millions Celebrate Crackdown on “Antifa,” Still Unsure Whether It’s a Band, a Virus, or a Salad Ingredient
Trump’s move to label Antifa a terrorist group has supporters celebrating the end of something they still can’t define, identify, or spell.
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Detox Teas That Melt Fat Fast: Science Says They Drain Your Wallet, Not Your Waistline
Detox teas promise miracles, celebrity endorsements swear by them, and science says they just flush out money faster than toxins.
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Men Against Trans Rights Confirmed to Be Expecting, Due Any Minute
The loudest men against trans rights look like they’re nursing twins, expecting triplets, and auditioning to breastfeed the hypocrisy right out of themselves.
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Gavin Newsom Awarded Nobel Peace Prize, Trump Calls It “Rigged Like a Leaf Blower”
Gavin Newsom wins the Nobel Peace Prize for political calm and climate leadership, while Trump insists he was “robbed by Norway” and demands a recount.
